At it again

How is it that we overlook things that are right before our eyes? I've been struggling with an issue for several months (well actually several issues --but I'm just gonna focus in on the one, lol). I was looking for guidance where it was unavailable and I kept running into a brick wall. It wasn't until I had a conversation today that I realized #1 IT'S NOT JUST ME and #2 I need to utilize the resources I have around me. So you know what this means right!?! More LIFE MAINTENANCE ughh!!! For starters I had to take a hiatus. I spent the earlier part of the day working and initially I had planned to continue working into the evening. Those plans changed because I couldn't stop thinking about the time I wasted waiting for help that was not forthcoming. I told myself that at least I know now and knowledge is power. I kept repeating my mantra KNOWLEDGE IS POWER but truthfully that didn't attenuate my feelings. That's when I decided I needed to WOOOSAAA!!! It's still kinda incredible that I'm blogging amidst the chaos that has overtaken my living space over the course of the week. I would have never been able to write or even relax amidst all of this prior to adopting a more balanced lifestyle. Yay progress! The next step is of course planning and tomorrow I'm back on the grind. Tomorrow begins a new week and I'm armed with new knowledge. I also plan to use wisdom. I could easily take the information I received today and use it to justify not asking for help and trying to do it all on my own. That is emphatically not the answer! There is more than one way to skin a cat. Cat lovers its just an expression ;o). In other words if guidance is not available from the logically expected source, think outside of the box. Most importantly DON'T GIVE UP! I read somewhere (paraphrasing) no matter how you're feeling emotionally, get dressed and show up! To put my own spin on it, the universe will match your work. From my experience as long as I put forth the effort things seem to work out. That's the basis for my 'never give up' attitude. With that I'm signing off til next time...

Deliberate steps are working...

I've got 20 minutes until my experiment finishes... I'm starving so not a good time to work on that research proposal. Sooo what better time to post a new entry!?! This week was a lot more challenging than last week in many ways, but it was also easier to navigate. Someone sent me an email forward (which I typically don't read) that I found interesting. It correlated a glass of water to stress and went something like this:

Holding a glass of water for a minute is no biggie
Holding that same glass of water in the same position for an hour might cause a cramp
Holding it like that for a day could cause some major issues (and would be down right silly unless you're going for a Guinness world record)

While water is important, I'd rather put it in the context of something I like more...SHOES!!! I've got fierce HIGH heels that I lovingly refer to as my "movie shoes". While I don't exclusively wear them to the movies (in fact I rarely wear them to the movies as most of my movie "dates" are with the kids), I wear them to "sit down" functions. So let's try this again:

Standing in my movie shoes for a minute is no biggie
Standing in them for an hour would cause foot cramps (and shaky heels)
Standing in them for a day would land me in a hospital somewhere!!!

So the gist of the glass of water concept is put it down and rest your arm from time to time. The gist of the shoe analogy is very much the same. At times you gotta put your feet up and rest those babies or better yet, take 'em off!!! The same goes for stress. Sometimes you have to defrag. If your arm would get sore holding the glass and your feet would hurt from wearing the shoes, think about what stress can do to your entire body!?! What a simple concept! And to think it had to be broken down to its simplest form in order for me to not only grasp it, but to embrace it. This week I took off the heels and exhaled. While life's problems did not go away, that made things a lot more bearable.

While I'm still struggling with shutting it down and going to sleep at a reasonable hour, I am going to sleep deliberately (pjs on, glasses off, and laptop resting comfortably on the bedside table). I'm also waking up on time which can be attributed to purposely setting the ridiculously annoying alarm on the clock radio in the bathroom to an equally annoying volume. I still haven't gotten used to it and it scares the bejesus out of me!!! There's no hitting snooze after running (not walking) into the bathroom to shut it off. These changes have made a difference. This morning I found myself getting dressed while singing and dancing to MJB's Family Affair. I'm ready for whatever life brings next week, but in the meantime I look forward to a balanced, productive, and fun weekend! Byeee!!!

What is Life Maintenance?

It seems as if almost weekly I'm figuring out my life. For me this generally means making a series of "to do" lists that is impossible to complete in the time allotted. I even go as far as creating a spreadsheet and planning out every waking hour! In an effort to "get things done", I often work until I fall asleep...fully dressed (glasses and all), lights on, and with my laptop on my lap if not somehow curled around it as if we're cuddling. When I finally become cognizant of my discomfort, I wake up to realize it's 3:30 AM and I have to start my day in 2.5 hours!!! I turn off my laptop, take off my glasses, and hit the lights. My alarm buzzes what feels like a minute later and it's 6 AM...I hit snooze until I can't anymore then frantically hop up at 7 AM. I'm late! The race begins...take the dogs out...the little one has pee'd because they should've been out an hour ago...then upstairs to wake up the kids. Even in their sleepy hazes, they manage to get ready before me. I'm running around like a chicken with my head cut off, my afro looking like JJ from Good Times, going down the checklist:
Are you guys ready?
Do you have everything?
Aaron did you brush your teeth?
What shoes do you have on?
Have you guys eaten breakfast?
Are your lunches fixed?
Come brush your hair... They look up from their bowls of cereal and answer yesss in unison. I continue to run back and forth until I finally give them the keys and send them out to the car. I run outside to get the dogs. I put the big one on her leash and the little one runs in, but can't seem to get into her crate so I drag her in after the big one is situated. I drive like a mad woman to get the kids to school on time over taking Marta buses so that they don't have to get tardy slips. The race ensues from there. And this is what leads to life maintenance...

The term life maintenance was introduced to me by a good friend, Leslie Etienne. I was explaining what I do...looking at the different components of my life from physical/mental/emotional to kids, financial, and even social. He said, "oh, you're doing life maintenance". Prior to that, I had no name for it besides maybe getting my life together, so I have to give him credit because those 2 words have become regularly used in my vocabulary. I have incorporated the term so much that someone may ask what I'm doing and the answer is "life maintenance" and between he and I, simply LM. So what is the point of this blog??? The point is not to just explain what life maintenance is but to become more efficient at it and to live through it. The truth of the matter is my life is not going to get any less intense anytime soon. I'm a single mother of four (2 children and 2 dogs). I work full time and am a full time grad student. As I embark on this long weekend--thanks MLK for making the ultimate sacrifice, I plan to do more planning, but I also plan to do some living...BALANCE. On Monday night I'm shutting down the computer intentionally by 11 PM, sleeping 7 hrs til 6 AM and beginning my week taking deliberate steps...NOT racing.